APOCALYPTO the MOVIE.

A friend of mine called me today at 1pm to invite me to a 4:15 showing of Mel Gibson's Apocalypto on 42nd Street. He asked if I was interested. I told him, yes. I was curious. Curious about Mel's take on pre-colonial Classic Mayan culture. I mean, what could a 21th century white man from Australia by way of Peekskill, New York know about Classic mesoamerican culture.

Well... Visually it was stunning. It's true what the critics say. Mel Gibson is a cinematic storyteller. It's the stories I don't like.

After two hours of savage murder, heart eating, throat cutting, testicle swallowing, raping, stabbing... I thought I would have to be carried off to the emergency room for trauma. The film was violent. And I kept thinking: Were the Mayans THIS brutal? But according to the Classic Mesoamerican experts... they were. They sacrificed children [so did the Jews of the bible]; they cut out the hearts of enemies [so did the Romans]. They also had an amazing agricultural system. They excelled in mathematical understanding and spiritual philosophy. The had the ONLY fully developed written language of the pre-Columbian Americas. They were a super kingdom for over a thousand of years, and in the end the Mayan kingdom dissolved. But in Mel Gibson's movie, all the Mayans did was kill and rape and behead and enslave... in technicolor.

But when I thought the movie couldn't get any crazier... it does. During a hyper intense scene where the protagonist is running for his life, a ship of Spanish conquistadors arrive on the beach with a life-size cross. To save Mayan civilization from its pagan, murderous ways?

I was appalled! Not because in Mel's delusional world the conquistadors arrive 300 years too early. [We'll talk about historical accuracy at another time]. But because that image of the cross and the conquistadors arriving right when the protagonist was about to be brutally murdered by his murdering Mayan enemies, was a clear message from Mel Gibson. The message? The Mayans were savages who killed and thieved each other until the Spanish with their Christianity arrived to save the day. Because, hey, it was obvious they needed salvation, right? The witchery and idol worship and greed was simply demonic. Let's face it: What all peoples of color have ever needed was some European colonist to pick up their dirty heathen pieces and offer a good dose of Christianity to save their pagan, savage little hearts. I don't think so!

Apocalypto was visually stunning and full of adrenaline. But was also the most expensive piece of Christian propaganda I have seen in quite some time. [Except for Gibson's Passion of Christ].

Until next time,

Keith